The clock is ticking! Time is almost up! Are we ready for Christmas?
The expectations for this celebration are well laid out by society. We see it in memes, movies, television shows, books, and more. Christmas comes with decorations inside and outside our homes. We are told we need a tree with lights and ornaments. We need lots and lots of presents that are beautifully wrapped and lovingly placed under that tree.
And then there is the food. It seems every family has its own traditions about what gets included in the Christmas meal. There may be turkey or ham or tofurkey, some combination of these or something entirely different. And, of course, there are treats. Lots and lots of treats – cookies, chocolate, adult beverages, and more. Christmas has become a time when we gorge ourselves on delicious fare and deal with the consequences later.
The social expectations for Christmas are well established. There is also an underlying assumption about who will do most of the work to make this ideal Christmas happen. In Western society, the prevailing expectation is that the work of caring for the family, the home, and the food, is the domain of women. Since many of the Christmas expectations are related to caregiving (we give presents to people we care about), the home (decorating), and food, that can mean creating the ideal Christmas also tends to fall to women.
Note: I am generalising based on social norms and fully understand there are homes where this work is differently assigned. In this moment, I invite you to consider who takes the most responsibility for Christmas in your family. How are they doing right now?
Fundamentally, the social expectations of motherhood are long established. Women and mothers in the Bible were likewise tasked with caring for the family, home, and food. Indeed, for far too long, the worth of women was directly tied to their ability to have children with their legal husband thus helping to perpetuate the male family line. This perspective is based on the expectations, priorities, and prejudices of human beings. In the story of Mary, we are reminded that God’s expectations and priorities for women and the world are different.
The angel said to her, ‘Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favour with God. And now, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High
The story of God entering this world as a human being begins with a woman, likely a teenager, who was asked by the angel if she would willingly participate in this miracle. God honours Mary and her autonomy through the invitation! She didn’t have to agree. She was free to choose the extent to which she wanted to be part of God’s plan. In this one moment, she could decide whether she wanted to be the mother of God. It was a luxury not often provided for women at that time.
Mary could decide, meaning she had the power to say no even as she had the wisdom to say yes. There is gift in knowing this, knowing that God’s expectations and priorities for us do not come with the pressure the world’s expectations impose. In God, we can say no and we can say yes. More than that, with God we can trust that, however we respond, God will stay with us, encouraging us, caring for us when it gets hard, and loving us through it all.
God’s expectations for every human being are for us to live in ways that are meaningful. God doesn’t need the tree, or decorations, or the bounty of presents, or the incredible amount of food society tells us are the ingredients for an ideal Christmas. God, in Jesus, the One for whom this celebration is oriented, only asks us: will we be part of the story? Will we choose to use the gifts God has given us to engage in ways that show our love for God and for our neighbour? Will we say yes to God’s invitations for our lives?
There is no pressure implied or otherwise. The choice is ours. God’s love leaves us free to decide. Knowing this, what will we do this Christmas? How will we look beyond society’s expectations of our celebration and honour God’s invitation to us? How might this work move us beyond sharing our grown-up Christmas list, to working towards its fulfillment? To what will we say yes this year? Let us pray as we sing: Grown Up Christmas List.